My first blog post!!! "feeling different")

Oct 13th, 2026

What i'm currently writing in my brand new vogue notebook (a freebie that came with the magazine i am totally going to read..) will hopefully become my first blog post! I decided to add a blog section to this website to practice my writing - but also as a semi journal-like recolection of my months/weeks. However, writing my thoughts and feelings straight into html feels very alien, hence the notebook ramble...
October this far has been lovely and I've realsied its partly becuase i feel different. I think alot has changed for me over the last few months. The main change being I am no longer a loser with no ambition. I want to go to university, BIMM brighton specifically to study Song writing and Production. Ive always wanted to go to uni but never had the balls to take it this seriously. Turns out all it takes is a really big depressive episode, realsiing how much i dislike my life and writing the first draft of my suicide note, to make a change. (The suicide note quip is a JOKE! is was more of a brainstorm then first draft).
Anyway apart from that i've also been feeling different becuase my work shifts now consist of full days, which requires me to be out of bed before 10 am. This is proving difficult, BUT very rewarding to my routine-riddled nervous system. The world before 10 am is beautiful and i'm happy to see more of it. I've also been feeling different becuase I can now drive! And it's taken some getting used to but all i want to do is drive everywhere even walking distances!!!! (im sorry Ozone layer! not really tho..this has taken me 4 years lemme burn you!!!)
Lastly, I SonnyMonsterAngelOfFate...... have been feeling different recently... becuase.. i've learnt how to CODE!!!! And it's the only thing I want to do. This website is all I want to do for hours and hours and HOUUURRRSS. I really have built my brain into this website, (you reader and elbows deep in my brain matter, right now!) You cant see it, but behind the beautiful and disturbing images and pages, are thousands of lines of code. I was inspired by Karly Hertzman (Wednesday's lead singer/songwriter ("swoooooooon!") ) and her website! I love the charm of websites like these. The awkward, clanky, early 2000's "i hope this doesn't put something dodgy on my computer" kind of websites. And just for your peace of mind, the only thing my very above board website will do, is put good vibes into your computer.
Anyway, I have so much stupid shit and semi-fun shit I should be doing instead of re-writing this into stupid code. So maybe I'll take a few days off to focus on some other stuff, plus my eyes hurt and are totally going square!!!!
★ BYEE ★ xxx